Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Look good for The Rapture


If you're looking to spend money on losing weight, enjoy caffeine, and wearing leggings, they've finally come up with a product just for you. A doctor, going by the name of Oz just featured the caffeinated and Shea Butter enriched attire on her show about inexpensive alternatives to cosmetic surgery. Here is an example of results to expect in 28 days...

From what I've perused, the advance technology for the Lytess Leggings is near revolutionary. All you have to do is move around a bit and the micro beads embedded into the fabric will be released and you can kiss cellulite away. My kitten friend, Faith,  was less than impressed when I nudged her awake from her slumber to tell her about them.   She started to remind me of our stance on all things diet related, but I quickly stopped her assuring her it wasn't for the cellulite relief that I wanted them, but for the caffeine high and silky skin they would provide. A $70 pair of tights that will last roughly 30 washes should save me a bounty in coffee, tea, and lotion. Her only response was to shake her head at me, mumbling about “silly humans” as she returned to her snooze.



I suppose it doesn't really matter, there is new proof the end times are among us. Birds have now begun to fall out of the sky. That's right. Birds. Parrots to be exact. The colorful winged creatures have discovered the indulgence of a good buzz and have been binging since early May, its rumored they plan to continue until the end times leave the cockroaches at the top of the food chain.


Until then here is a video of an awkward political moment to enjoy...


2 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

I'm not going to believe a word they say about those leggings until you try them and write a review. That's how much faith I have in you and your kitten called Faith. I'm wondering whether going to the dentist might be more fun than attending a state banquet.

Emma Claw said...

As someone who harbors a great fear for dentists—and blacksmiths for that matter—I can almost guarantee, that would indeed be more exciting then attending the state banquet.
I'll keep you posted on the tights.